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Highway Ghosts
Sep. 21st, 2012 06:38 amI walk home from work, sometimes. It's a mild walk down a stretch of highway flanked on each side by trees, a quick turn to the left, one to the right, up a hill that's a sudden vein into suburbia and then right to my home. I work third shift at the same place I've been working for eight years, now.
This walk at night is often peaceful for me. I don't know that many people would find shipping trucks and early risers rushing past you, headlights burning twin death rays out of the night, relaxing. I'm not many people, though. I'm me. I find peace in the idea that I'm a shadow among shadows. I'm a highway ghost, in their view for a moment while the light washes over me and then gone forever.
Those things give me comfort. I'm a bit stuck where I am at present. I walk to work because I do not own a car. I will not be able to get a car anytime soon because I do not make much money and the money I do make is hacked apart at the end of the month by bills, loans and other expenses. If I am able to save a few hundred a month, I am fortunate. That word sticks in my throat when I say it, even in jest, to my friends who are in the same situation. Fortunate.
My life has brightness in it, too. Make no mistake regarding that. I have my arts. I write novels, or try to, in the hopes that I may publish them and make that a career. I also write music and play out sometimes, too rarely for my taste, in hopes that this, too, can become a career for me. Some people think I'm a fool for trying one, let alone both, of these. I would dearly like to shove my middle finger through an eye and see if they repeat it.
That's actually a benefit of having a blog like this. Each time I write, no matter what I write, I get better. This blog, and the other blog I have that specifically focuses on my writing and my music (which I will link on this blog when it gets properly hefty as it, too, is new) and even the paper journal I keep in meatspace all serve to sharpen my prose. This is a sharpening I desperately need. One could say any creative-type is always in dire need of honing their craft but, in my case, it's particularly true.
Another big factor in me starting this blog is that it will be kept separate from the people I know in my day-to-day life. While I certainly won't jump through fire to keep people from finding it, I won't bring it up. This will lead to some venting I may otherwise not do that I find may be helpful to me. I don't feel like I have any titanic secrets to keep from the people close to me but I may be wrong about that.
Into the fray.
This walk at night is often peaceful for me. I don't know that many people would find shipping trucks and early risers rushing past you, headlights burning twin death rays out of the night, relaxing. I'm not many people, though. I'm me. I find peace in the idea that I'm a shadow among shadows. I'm a highway ghost, in their view for a moment while the light washes over me and then gone forever.
Those things give me comfort. I'm a bit stuck where I am at present. I walk to work because I do not own a car. I will not be able to get a car anytime soon because I do not make much money and the money I do make is hacked apart at the end of the month by bills, loans and other expenses. If I am able to save a few hundred a month, I am fortunate. That word sticks in my throat when I say it, even in jest, to my friends who are in the same situation. Fortunate.
My life has brightness in it, too. Make no mistake regarding that. I have my arts. I write novels, or try to, in the hopes that I may publish them and make that a career. I also write music and play out sometimes, too rarely for my taste, in hopes that this, too, can become a career for me. Some people think I'm a fool for trying one, let alone both, of these. I would dearly like to shove my middle finger through an eye and see if they repeat it.
That's actually a benefit of having a blog like this. Each time I write, no matter what I write, I get better. This blog, and the other blog I have that specifically focuses on my writing and my music (which I will link on this blog when it gets properly hefty as it, too, is new) and even the paper journal I keep in meatspace all serve to sharpen my prose. This is a sharpening I desperately need. One could say any creative-type is always in dire need of honing their craft but, in my case, it's particularly true.
Another big factor in me starting this blog is that it will be kept separate from the people I know in my day-to-day life. While I certainly won't jump through fire to keep people from finding it, I won't bring it up. This will lead to some venting I may otherwise not do that I find may be helpful to me. I don't feel like I have any titanic secrets to keep from the people close to me but I may be wrong about that.
Into the fray.
